Fighting my corner

OK, I'll level with you.

The reason why I haven't been on my blog for the last few days is that I have been in a bit of bother with the 'auforities'. Get this: Apparently I am a bit troublesome and as a result, Jono (my trainer) has taken me away from the track for a while. He says that I get into too many fights and upset the other dogs.

Fights?! Fights?! Can a bloke not gently kick, punch, headbutt and bite his fellow dog anymore? That's not a fight - it's just a gentle reminder of who's the boss. I've had enough of these flippin' sandal-wearing, cappucino-drinking, cardigan-clad liberals that you see on every corner these days, telling you that you can't get your knuckle duster/Uzi out anymore because it's not politically correct. Pansies, the lot of them.

Ahem.

Anyway, all I've done is given out a few gentle slaps and I am being threatened with being 'taken away from racing'. We've come to a compromise and I am just taking a few weeks off before I return to the track. Please don't misunderstand me though - I'm a lover, not a fighter. True, I did some boxing in my younger days (I was a Flyer-weight) when I used to idolise my favourite boxer, Muha-mutt Ali. Ah, them were the days - I couldn't wait for the bell to sound at the start of Grrrrrround 1 where I'd go out and give my all. Anyway, that was then but this is now and I don't want anyone misunderstanding me.

At least I can count on the wishes of my good friend Phil 'the Tuffmeister' Tufnell at times like these (see above). He's a good lad, is Tuffers. He's always been there for me no matter how stupid or Silly (mid-on) I have been. He is a wicket guy and will always push the boundaries for me. His wishes really keep me going.

OK, that's all for now. There's alot of stuff going down round here, which I can't tell you about yet. The only thing that keeps me going (along with the ladies) are the wishes from My Triple F's - Friends of Flying Frank. Keep 'em coming to woof@flyingfrank.com

Peace. Love. Woof.


Flying Frank

Three's the magic number

Phewwweeee. You may have noticed that I haven't written a blog posting for about 10 days or so now....well that's only because I've flippin well been racing non-stop, isn't it? I've been as hectic as a red light bulb salesman in Amsterdam, I tell you.

So before I explain the photo above, here are my results in the last ten days:

27th Jan (Walthamstow) - I know I have told you about this one, but I came in first

6th Feb (The 'Stow again) - First

8th Feb (Harlow) - You've guessed it Chicas, I came in first yet again

As you would imagine, I am absolutely overjoyed at this somewhat purple patch in my career. You will see above that there is a photo message from my good friend and former Olympic gold medalist, Linford Christie (or The 'Ford as I call him). I am not ashamed to admit that The 'Ford has been behind my recent revival and it is down to him that I am turning it round.

He's a good lad, Linford, and he calls me his little Chumpion. He encourages me not to become Dogged down in all the hullabaloo that surrounds my races but just focus...and when the traps open, run like the clappers! He actually called me last night and told me that I am reminding him of his form in 1992-3, when he scooped both Olympic and World Golds. That may be so Linford, but you didn't get the pick of the bunch at Charlie Chan's Discotheque, did you mate? No Sally Gunnell for me!

Ahem, back to work now, methinks.

Keep well people - I reckon I will be racing this week, so will keep you posted.

Peace. Love. Woof.

Flying Frank

Run off my feet!

Hello people,

As you will know, I haven't been able to get on T'internet lately to write my world-famous blog.

Reason being see, that in the last few days I have raced not once, not twice but THREE TIMES! It's a bit like being that Daniel Beckenham fella at Real Muttrid - the more famous you get, the more demand for personal appearances there are, the less time you have for your loved ones. Much like the ladies in the picture. Can't quite recall who the one on the right is, but the laydee on the left is that Keeley. She's the one that the Chelsea player Joe Cole got a bit of bother over and she is also really successful in her own right - she has her own column on page 3 of The Sun, no less. She's a great pal and if I could just get a BLEEDIN' MINUTE on my own, I could give the Keelymeister the attention she so rightly deserves.

In any case, here is how I have been doing:

Saturday 21st Jan - ran in the first race at The Stow. My owners were there, big expectations, and I blew it. Fifth. Very embarrassed and ashamed. Still got tanked up at Charlie Chans', mind.

Wednesday 25th Jan - Jono stuck me in an evening race at Harlow. Harlow can you go, you might ask? I mean - Harlow for heavens' sake! Because I was out there, my owners never came to see me, and for that reason I can't give you a full description of what happened (ahem). But I came 4th.

Friday 27th Jan - Because of what is now known as 'The Harlow debacle', Jono stuck me in the afternoon races. Well I stuffed it up him, didn't I. Only powered home to a now famous victory - the fifth in the Flying Frank story. get in!

So now, after three races in six days, we look to the future. No race scheduled as yet, but will keep you posted. In the meantime, I shall keep myself busy with old Keeley and, er, wotsername...


Peace. Love. Woof.


Flying Frank

Race alert

...Just wanted to let all my fans know that the details of my next race have been announced:

It's tomorrow (Sat 20th Jan) - Yikes!

The usual venue - Walthamstow Dog track (aka The Stow)

7.30pm, first race of the night, trap 2.

There's also a trophy up for grabs so I am hopeful I can scoop the booty.

Afterwards I am going to the cinema. Feel free to join me - I am going with some of my crew down the Thurrock Odeon after to see Cheaper by the Dozen 2 - this time you'd better watch out! I just loved the first one and thought it was a true masterpiece of our time. It worked on so many levels and I realised it's true - it is cheaper by the dozen.

Will let you know how it goes - wish me luck by emailing me! woof@flyingfrank.com

Peace. Love. Woof.

Flying Frank

The hostess with the Makostness

I'll be honest with you, I very nearly wasn't here this week.

After weeks of talks, offers, counter-offers and cloak-and-dagger meetings, I decided in the end to turn down the opportunity to appear on Big Brother.

Whilst I'm a big fan of the Channel Paw programme, I just couldn't bring myself to do it. They would have me up to all sorts on there, probably getting me on a chair trying to impersonate a human being and all that. It would have been so humiliating and I just couldn't bring myself to do it. I know I like a bit of fun with the ladies and all, but at the end of the day racing is my business.

Besides, I have to avoid Tracy Bingham for the foreseeable future (if she asks, just say I have moved to the Congo and should be back sometime in 2010). The package they were offering me was fantastic as well - one years supply of Pedigree chum, a brand new piece of rope to chew on (mmmm, rope) and a pooper scooper. They also offered expenses too. They were prepared to take me down there in the back of a brand-new Volvo estate and stick me in a proper wooden kennel (from B&Q) before I went in the house. Despite all that, I've decided to concentrate on work.

Nevertheless, I thought I would put up a picture of my good mate Makosi Musambasi, star of the last series of Big Brother. She's a good lass, The Makos-meister, and we originally met when I was making a personal appearance in Zimbabwe many years ago - I'm too much of a gent to tell you what happened, but suffice to say I didn't let my country down. I have given her a bit of advice on how to handle fame and as soon as she becomes famous, I'm sure she'll implement it.

As I was saying, I'm concentrating on my racing at the moment and the situation is simple - I'm battered, bruised but making progress. I raced at The Stow on Saturday night and I was even the favourite to win. Alas, the world of greyhound racing is quite bitchy at times and there are several people who want to ruin things for me, hence me getting bumped twice in the same race. Nevermind, I won't let them get me down. Onwards, upwards and onto the next race. Will let you know when it is.

Got to go now - I have a conference call about the possibility of appearing on Living TV's 'I'm famous and frightened'.

Peace. Love. Woof.


Flying Frank


P.S. - Thanks to my homegirl Diana. I lurrved the pictures of those ladies. Keep them coming people to woof@flyingfrank.com

P.P.S - I have heard about a certain dog called Jus for Xmas who is trying to muscle in on my territory. Yawn. Ain't nothing like the real thing, baby.

Get back

Get back.

Get back to where you once belong, as the Beatles sang.

And I am - this Saturday infact where I am racing again at The Stow.

If any of the Flying Frank Army want to come down and see me, I am running in the 21.21pm race, over 475 metres. Titled the 'Enter our nomination cup...your chance to win £1000' stakes, I hope to be bounding out of trap 2 (boo! as you know, the Original Frankster prefers trap one - the ambience in there is just soooo more appealing) and with a bit of luck, onto a famous victory. Then onto Charlie Chan's if I win, ladies!

Hope to see you all on Saturday night - drop me a line at woof@flyingfrank.com to wish me luck.

Peace. Love. Woof.

Flying Frank

P.S. - Big shout going out to one of my newest homegirls and brand spanking new Triple F (Friend of Flying Frank), Diana Williams. I hear you have just discovered The Flyer - keep on spreading the word down at the golf club, girlfriend.

Bigger, better & badder for ' 06

Hello to all my lovely, wonderful, fans. I hope you had a superb holiday season and are geared up for a great 2006 (or two thousand and chicks as I am calling it).

For me, the year has got off to a tremendous start. First of all, I got this brilliant message from my youngest fan, a little bonny, bouncing cherub called Leni Zetter. Leni (she lets me address her by her full name, Leonard) was only six weeks old when this picture was taken, has really helped me with my rehabilitation. With her simple gesture, she has taken me back to my inner child. Subliminally, she has sent me the encouragement I have been looking for: "Just run like a young child, The Flyer, be free like me and you can do it.'

And Lo and behold, the minute I take on her advice, things start to look up.

As you know, I wasn't a very happy bunny (mmmm, bunny) in the last part of 2005. I was stuck in the BAGS (Bookmakers Afternoon Greyhound Service) and I was on a one-way ticket to Battersea. But Leni's message changed all that. It made me face up to my problems and act more like a dog, not a puppy. So I had it out with Jono, my trainer. I sat him down and tenderly explained to him that if he didn't get me out of the BAGS and back onto the night races at The Stow then I would become particularly 'friendly' with his entire roster of female greyhounds. He knows my reputation - and you can guess the rest.

I did have a couple more BAGS races at the end of the month, but I made my comeback on the big stage as a late replacement on the 30th December. I came second, but knew that I was feeling good. And then, for the first time in over four weeks, I was back racing proper on a Saturday night at The Stow.

Now, I don't like the winter too much, but I wanted to turn on the style a little bit for my fans. Although I came third, I posted the fastest time of my career in the race (29.40 secs) and I was well chuffed. Infact, so high was the standard that the winner, Spoofy Doo, posted the quickest time at Walthamstow this quarter. Anyway, I may not have won....BUT I'M BACK BABY! That's right, I have returned to the evening circuit and the only thing I need to do is make sure I stay there.

Well, there are two things really. I also need to take one of the female dogs at the kennels to a doctor I know who can 'sort out' problems before Jono finds out. Don't tell him, I'll know it was you.

Onwards and upwards then. We are going to start back up soon with even more celeb pictures and crazy postings from my celebrity life, so make sure that, during the forthcoming Year of the Dog, you keep tuned to www.flyingfrank.com !

Peace. Love. Woof.

Flying Frank

Review of the year

...and so to my last posting (probably) of 2005. This has been a true rollercoaster of a year, where my crushing downs have been offset by some tremendous highs.

A good time then, for my top five highlights of the year:

Being bought by Frank PR

These are the guys that really catapulted me onto the world stage. I was just a journeyman young pup in Ireland before they came along. Everyone always has offers from Britain, but this one was tempting for two reasons. First of all they offered me the Deluxe Pedigree Chum (the regular stuff gives me real Delhi Belly) and secondly this - my own blog where I can reach my fans wherever and whenever I like. They are a great company, although one of them smells a bit.

Winning my first race

July 21st 2005. 9.03 pm. Odds of 7/2.

Me. The crowd. The smell of scampi wafting across the stow. I felt good, really good and I showed them as I pipped the other fella across the line (whatever happened to him? Last I heard he was in Korea...) and tasted for the first time, the sweet smell of success. I had another three victories that would follow for the rest of the year, but this was the greatest. No trophy, but immense pride - pride that there and then, I was on top of the world.

Saving the Stow

Most of you know by now that I embarked on a social action campaign earlier this year to save the home of greyhound racing, Walthamstow dog track. Their were rumours that the chaps who own the track were going to sell it, so I decided to do something about it - and launched my own online petition at www.savethestow.com . You can still sign up to it if you haven't yet done so. People always come up to me and ask why I bothered...well let me tell you, dogs can make a difference:

Laika (he, the Russian space dog)....Lassie...Bouncer...David Blunkett's dog (the one on the lead, not the one he....sorry, the lawyers stopped me there)...there is a doggie hall of fame and I want a part of it. The campaign was such a success that I made appearances on BBC News, BBC London radio and in The Star, Express, Sun and other papers.

My celeb pals

I am very fortunate to be able to count several celebrities as close, personal friends. In the past year, I have had traditional messages of support from a range of celebrities. The fella who started this all off - and who is my closest pal of them all - is cricket legend Brian Lara, whos pic I have re-posted at the top. Since him, the likes of Alan Hansen, Lady Isabelle Hervey, Teddy Sheringham, Ms Dynamite and the hottest babe on the planet, Lauren Pope, have all sent in their messages. They really help keep me sane because they understand the pressures that a celebrity lifestyle brings - whether it's the press taking a dogmatic view of me or if my management are being bone idle and don't listen, they tell me how to handle it. There will be more of the same in 2006, hopefully with one from the big one, Flying Frank Lampard.

and finally....my merry band of Triple F's

The terms Triple F's refers to 'Friends of Flying Frank' (by the way, by reading this you are one) and more than anything or anyone, it is them who keep me sane. There have been some troubling times recently, and whilst I am not going to dwell on them now (I'll leave that for 2006, when I hit the bottle and end up checking into a drying out clinic in Arizona - you will be able to read all about it in my autobiography 'One for the road: The diary of a celebrity, alcoholic greyhound') I am appreciative of the way you have always been there for me. Whether it's messages, emails or coming to attend my races I know that I am loved and I love you all back. Just give me your leg and I will show how much via physical expression.

People, whatever your bag is this winter - Christmas, Chanukah, sunshine, drinking - have a great one and let's all have a stormer in 2006.

Here is to rocking the stow next year!

Peace. Love. Woof.


Flying Frank

Baggsy not me

I don't want to talk about this week too much. After my upbeat postings of recent weeks, particularly with the good wishes of Phil and Ms D, I was feeling upbeat. Then I heard the word that every dog dreads:

BAGS

Standing for Bookmaker's Afternoon Greyhound Service, these are the races that are shown in betting shops in the afternoon. Away from the glamour of a night at The Stow, this is the greyhound graveyard, where the duds and degenerates go to race. I don't want to dwell on it, I really don't, but I had a BAGS race this Wednesday and came in third. For reasons only he knows, Jono put me in it.

Rather than being watched by my adoring faithful, in good spirits at my rightful home, I was being watched by a bunch of old men, lubricated by good spirits from the retirement home.

No further comment, but we have a bit of an Sir Alex Ferguson-Roy Keane situation going on here. EXCEPT DO YOU THINK ALEX FERGUSON WOULD PUT KEANE IN THE YOUTH TEAM, DO YOU? DO YOU????Ahem...It's a real bone of contention between us and I don't want to talk anymore.

I am terrier-fied about the future.

Sorry people, no more from me today. Be back soon.

P.S. - A massive, 'Sorry, I wish my heart was in it' big-up for Agent in the Field (AIF) Bloch. Happy 36th, pal.

P.P.S - A big, 'I've had better weeks than this' booyakasha to AIF Lynch. Sayonara sweetheart.

P.P.P.S - A big 'If you were a tree, I wouldn't even cock my leg' small-up to non-AIF Spriggsy.

Peace. Love. Woof.

Flying Frank

Little 'mite

Greetings to all you 'Friends of Flying Frank' or, to those of you in the know, my merry band of Triple F's!

Before I start, I would like to take this opportunity to pay homage to one of the greatest ever 'Agents in the Field' (otherwise know as AIF - the people who carry out the good dogs work).

Ever since the start of this blog, there has literally been no celebrity too small for this AIF to bother and he has brought back the goods from all of them, time and time again. As today is the anniversary of his birth, I therefore want to dedicate this posting to the memory of a lovely bloke, who we will just refer to as AIF Kaye..... He's not dead by the way, he just has a really, really poor memory. He forgets everything! Thanks for everything AIF Kaye - and keep up the good work.

I'd also like to talk about one of the most lasting and important friendships I have. You can see her in the picture - it is none other than R&B superstar Ms Dynamite, who sent me a message recently. Now, unlike most of the other lady folk whose company I keep, everything is well above board with her. Although myself and Ms Dynamite have always had a bit of an explosive relationship, we tend not to blow anything up out of proportion. She's always had a short fuse but I just try to make her laugh - hence the name Ms Dynamite tee hee.

Despite constant rumours, our friendship is and has always been platonic - she is just a very near Ms. I have always tried to be there for her and I was one of the first people to congratulate her after she triumphed at an awards ceremony a couple of years ago, when she picked up two awards. I always knew that she had a lovely pair of Brits and this just confirmed it.

So now we have Ms Dynamite signed up to the Flying Frank campaign, where to next? My enemies (and believe it or not, there are a few, aren't there Woodlands Vieri?!) thought that I was full of it, that I wouldn't be able to maintain such an impressive list of celebrities, that eventually I would fall upon my very last Big Brother contestant and be left bankrupt of any decent Triple F's. Wrong, the list is growing - make sure you log onto www.flyingfrank.com soon to see who else I have up my sleeve. In addition to that, please, please keep signing up at www.savethestow.com, as well as sending in your emails, messages, xmas cards and Somerfield vouchers to woof@flyingfrank.com. Yes, Somerfield vouchers.

OK - bye for now.

P.S. - No racing for me this week, but will almost deffo have a pre-xmas one!

P.P.S. - Agent in the Field Spriggsy - calm down fella, we don't want you to get Lamped by anyone.

Peace. Love. Woof.

Flying Frank

Taylor made

Hello all you doggie-followers,

Blimey, it's December already. Who would Adam & Eve it - only a few weeks until xmas and it's so exciting down here at the Kennels. I can't wait till the 25th - we are all going to gather round the fire, roast a few chesmutts and see what goodies Santa Paws has got for us this year. Until then though, it's just work, work, work.

I raced again last Saturday - and came fifth again. Obviously I'm not a happy bunny....no, that's a bad choice of words, sorry....but I am not best pleased and I am at a loss as to what to do - just can't seem to get it together at the moment. What with my form, and the fact that they have just opened up a new Thai meat buffet restaurant in Claverhambury, I need to turn it around quick smart.

After the race on Saturday, I really needed to speak to the people that know me best, really needed to hear from those who care about me and I was so pleased to receive a timely message from my good friend and 12-time world darts champion Phil 'The Power' Taylor (in the picture with his daughter). I like to surround myself with winners and that's why I am matey with Phil - he hits the bulleseye with me - always has done - and that's why we are so one-hundred-and-matey.

Here's the John Lowe-down on our friendship:

Jono (my trainer) has always said that I Dart round the track and so one day he got the idea of trying to get a couple of dart boards. Unfortunately, he couldn't a-Fordham, but what he did manage to do was introduce me to The Power. Ever since then, our friendship has taken flight. We do tons of stuff together - go for walks on Dart-moor, take drives through the Dart-ford tunnel and go for relaxing walks in Arrow-on-the-hill. We also share a love of the characters in the Star Wars movies, particularly Dart Vader.

It's because of our closeness that this message means so much to me - Phil knows that I am trying to be the best I can be and he knows that I am searching for answers. His message is simple - "Flying Frank - You have the Power". Of course! How could I have missed it all this time. It's me - I have the power. It's not just me, Phil and Snap though - we all do. All this time I have been searching for answers, blaming trap numbers, blaming Jono, blaming the scampi and chips, blaming the 17 women that I entertain each and every night. All I needed to do was follow his Phil-osophy and I would find the answer. I HAVE THE POWER! He truly is the Wordsworth of our times and I just want to take this opportunity to Bristow my best wishes on him and his family - he's oche by me, is Phil.

I feel like a new man. Watch out, Chicas.

Speak to you lovely people later,

Peace. Love. Woof.

Flying Frank

All creatures great and small

Hi People,

I know, I know. I'm a bad doggie. I'm in the Doghouse. I'm the mutt in a rutt.

Apologies to all of you - I clearly haven't been writing all that much of late and to be honest, it's not fair to you, my fans. If I am to continue with my plans for (Greyhound) world domination then I need to treat my loyal army a bit better and keep you better informed as to my goings on.

To tell you the truth, I have been through alot of high and lows of late, as you can see in the picture. A few people have a problem with my friends in the pic, but I don't see what all the fuss is about. So I like to chill with a miniature goblin from time to time - what's the problem, dude? So I shoot a few hoops with a seven foot basketball player of-an-evening - what ya gonna do, sue me? And yes, I enjoy the company of a vertically challenged lady in a gold lame bikini - What can I say? I'm a lover, not a fighter, and I make no apologies if the regime don't like it man. They keep me sane with their tall stories and short anecdotes and I love em.

You may have noticed that I haven't been racing too much of late. Well, I had a run-out last Saturday and it just didn't come together for me. It was embarrassing to tell you the truth. Some joker called Bell Crusader beat me by an absolute country mile, I ended up coming fifth and as a result, Jono thinks that I should take a week or two off.

No races for me this week then - instead I am catching up on some reading. I am currently working my way through the entire works of William Shakespeare - his stuff is actually not bard for an old, dead bloke. I have already finished reading Twelfth Bite and I am working my way through Mutt Ado About Nothing. It really helps me take my mind of the pressures of racing and get away from the hustle and bustle of the kennels. Apart from that I've just been getting on with my campaign at www.savethestow.com and deploying more agents in the field to bring the home the bacon. Mmmm, Bacon. Or if they can't bring home the bacon, then a celebrity picture message will suffice. Mmmmm, celebrity picture messages.

So get cracking people - believe me when I say I have some great celebrity messages, agents in the field anecdotes and features coming up in the next few weeks, so keep your eyes peeled.

Peace. Love. Woof.

Flying Frank


P.S. - A big, big 'you should be ashamed of yourself' slating goes out to AIF (Agent In the Field) Spriggsy for his shameful performance. Right your wrong, man!

Ray-king it in

As you could probably tell, I was like a dog with two chicks after my victory last Saturday night. I blew the others out of the water - see ya later Tipsy Tarquin, eat mustard! Every victory is a special one, but this was especially sweet as it was from the dreaded trap 2. As you know, I start shaking when they hand me that blue jacket, so I was stoked that I could pull it out of the bag.

Because of that I have decided to take it easy this week, hence no racing and no blog postings. Instead, I decided to go oop north and see a good mate of mine, footballer Ray Parlour (pictured). We always go out on a bender whenever possible (Escapades in Darlington is our favourite haunt) and when we are together, people call us the Poodle Parlour. Seriously, the man is a Ray of sunshine in this little doggies life, although now he is in the North East, we just don't get the Tyne to see each other anymore. He always Rayses my expectations that we might get to have a sherbert together, but it is not a as frequent as when he was at Arsenal. Still, I know he is in good hands up there at Boro as my close pals Bark Viduka and Ugo Ehidog are there to take care of him. I also had some good buddies at the club when Terrier Venables was the manager and going back in time, when they used to play at Ayeresome Bark, which is why I always look for their results.

As you know by now, I am big, big, big mates with some seriously famous footballing folk. However, one of my good buddies in the game, Flying Frank Lampard, has so far been quiet on the old messaging front - come on agents in the field! Let's get hold of the original Frankster and get his message. As for other 'slebs, they have literally been flying in and I will put them all up as often as possible (we only have dial up at the Kennels, see).

I am chilling from racing for a few days - you have probably noticed that I have not competed this week - and while resting, I have been asked alot about various rumours. One such story that has surfaced concerns whether I am going to go out on the road, away from the stow, and emBark on a Nationwide tour. Whilst I can't comment specifically on these stories, what I can say is that I am planning to go out on the road, away from the stow, and emBark on a nationwide tour.

More to follow on all this, but need to go now.

Couple of shout-outs:

- A massive 'big up yourself' to agent in the field Eldridge for your continued support for the www.savethestow.com campaign. You are a gent, sir!

- A huge 'hare is approaching' shout-out to agent in field Jacobs for your recent contribution. You are a lady, madam!

That's all folks - keep up the good work.

Peace. Love. Woof.

Flying Frank

Live from the VIP section of Chans

I'm dedicated to this blog I am. Tonight at The Stow was another one of those nights I was born for. In the 2039 race I came out of trap 2 all motivated up (thanks to Mr Mo). Taking 2nd place after the first bend I picked my moment on the back straight and came flying through. All credit to trap 1 for pushing me to the max, but in the end you were no match for 'The Flyer' were you mate?! So another win means another party.

Which takes me to where I am now, in the VIP section at Chans, furiously pawing this message to my fans. Its been a while since my last victory and I thought I'd celebrate in style the only way I know. Quick shower after the race, splash on a bit of the old smelly stuff, on to meet some laydeees and down a bit of the bubbly. I've just taken a break from pulling proceedings to post this message to you and it feels good. Not half as good as some lucky lady here is going to feel later though. She may get a bit disoriented, as for her the fireworks are going to go on all night.

Peace. Love. Woof.
FF

PS. Message to Jono - don't wait up for me tonight. ;-)

Motivation's what you need

Well if you haven't already heard, I came second. It was a tremendous night at The Stow (the place was packed to the rafters - how can they even think about closing it down?? - stop this madness and go to www.savethestow.com now) and there was a big posse from Frank PR there.

On the plus side, I ran fine and I am really in my stride now after my injury. However, I don't know if it was the bright lights, the atmosphere or the fact that Dave the handler wasn't with me (he's only part-time, you see), but it just didn't happen. I went round fine and in the back straight I flew, but ultimately I could only manage second. I hate that flippin' trap 2.

Anyway, you can probably see a pattern emerging - second. I keep coming second! Silver medal positions a-plenty and I'm getting fed up with it. Which is why I have called in reinforcements. I got on the blower and got my big mate Mr Motivator to give me a bit of advice. You can see Mr Mo, as I call him, in the photo above - I have known him for a while, primarily through Lorraine Kelly (Special LK) and their connection at Greyhound Morning TV. He's a great guy but not sure his message is going to hep me, I mean:

Be bad? - I'm not Michael Jackson mate!

Be mean? - ahem, I am Irish, not Scottish

Be wicked? - Whatever Mr Mo. 'Wicked' is so nineties. I'm not wicked, I'm dope.

He also told me I should think about a Marathon. Don't know about that one - I prefer to think about Maltesers. They're the lighter way to enjoy chocolate.

I don't know, he has a good track record and he is a lovely guy, apart from when he wears those colourful leotard get-ups. It's enough to put a man off his Iams. Anyway, I will keep his words close to my heart (as I do those of all my celeb friends) as I have another race coming up - I am flying out of trap 2 (boo! Down with the red coat. Give me red I tell thee! Red!) in the 20.39. It takes place this Saturday night and with a Stow Faithful pushing me on, keep your fingers crossed for me.

As ever, full updates only on www.flyingfrank.com

Later,

Peace. Love. Woof.

Flying Frank

Al in a day's work

As I said in my last post, I would be providing all my Triple F's with a picture of a celebrity message. And here it is - my old time friend, BBC TV's Alan Hansen just pupped a message in the post to me - and what a corker it is. Big Al (as I know him) and I discovered some years ago that we have a lot in common and we have been buddies ever since. We are both professional sportsmen by profession, we are both housewives' favourites and we are both close mates with Gary Lineker ("Links" to us) - although I lost touch with him after he left Barkalona.

Big Al and I first met when he was playing for Liverpool. We just bumped into each other and found that we got on ferry, ferry well. Scouse about that? There were lots of doggie type people around Anfield at that time - for one thing Kenny Dogleash was the manager but he also played with Alan Kennel-edy and Greyhound Souness. As a legend of the game - and a European pup winner - I find comfort in settling down each week to watch big Al on Match of the Stray.

Spookily, I'm racing in 'The Liverpool FC Champions of Europe Stakes' tomorrow (trap 2, start time 21.21). Given the name of the race and the message above, I want to do it for The Hanster. Watch this space.

Peace. Love. Woof.

Flying Frank

Runner up

Well I guess it's about time I gave you folk an update on what I have been doing the last few days - my racing career, as always, has been taking top priority. To keep it brief, I came in second. You can't win everything you enter and I was happy to come round with no problems. No great shakes, just a silver medal for me this time.

I was rather hoping that it would be my last race over 475 metres. Alas, I am next scheduled to race this Saturday night, the 29th, over the same distance. I shall be bounding out of trap 2 in the 21.21pm race, also known as "The Liverpool FC Champions of Europe Stakes". I wanted to run in "The Liverpool FC Steven Gerrard one man band stakes" but they wouldn't let me. With a bit of luck it will all go swimmingly and I will head off into Charlie Chan's with a trophy under my collar.

I haven't been doing all that much the last few days, to tell you the truth. I have basically been training, chilling and concentrating on my campaign (go to www.savethestow.com if you haven't already. And even if you have, get your gran to sign up as well. We are running a bit short on grannies). I have been thinking about getting a part-time job actually, something to while away the hours and to earn a bit of extra cash for pedigree chum and the like. I did work for a few days in a butchers shop, but I found I just wasn't tall enough to reach the meat on the top shelf - the steaks were too high. I also went for a job in a dentists, but I was late on my first day - I didn't get in until tooth hurty. Then there was the time I went to work in a doctors surgery, but I just didn't have the patients. If I'm honest, I think I could be a treecutter - I have alot of experience with bark and I wood love it.

Just not sure how to pass my spare time now that Hollyoaks actresses are soooo 2004.

I guess I will just have to concentrate on my racing career, but if my army of triple F's have any suggestions, please email me on woof@flyingfrank.com.

Be good boys and girls,

Peace. Love. Woof.

Flying Frank

P.S - another celeb message before the weekend - watch this space!

What a Carr-y on

Hello people,

I wanted to alert you to a couple of things that have been going down. Firstly, my owners at Frank PR had an absolute stormer of an evening last night at the PR Week awards ceremony. They won a trophy for the best consumer campaign of the year. If that's a bit gobbledegook for you, I think it basically means they are very good at PR. So congrats to them! Also my good mate, the comedian Jimmy Carr, was presenting the awards and as well as mentioning me on stage he also left a message for his old mucker, The Flyer.

Me and Jimbo (as I know him) go way back and share alot of history together. We first met in the fruit and veg isle of our local supermarket. He was buying some Carr-ots and I was looking for the Ava-Carr-do's. We just hit off and developed a close bond. Although he has mood swings (he can be a bit of a Jimmy Crankie) and is often a little difficult to understand (he's somewhat of a Jimmy Riddle) we share a lot of common interests. We both have a love of travel and often go to Carr-diff. Or Carr-digan. Or Red-Carr.

And guess what form of transport we use to get there? That's right....a motorcycle.

One with a side-carr.

He also loves animals - just look at the evidence. He is big mates with me, he writes in Zoo magazine and hosts a show called '8 out of 10 cats'. Mmmmm....cats. All in all, he's a great guy and I was delighted that he had the time to send his good pal this message.

Away from Jimbo, some quick news for my army of 'Triple F's': I am back racing, tomorrow night (Thursday), at 9.40pm. It's over 475 metres and I am coming out of trap 2. Not my favourite, but there you go. It is in the esteemed Chas & Dave testimonial race (They wrote their song 'Rabbit' for me - yummy) so I'll be doing my best. Keep an eye out.

Must get back to training now - later.

Peace. Love. Woof.

Flying Frank

A busy doggie

Hello to one and all.

Well, things have gone bananas round Claverhambury kennels in the last few weeks and I thought it was about time I did a little recap for you all. For one thing, the media have gone crazy. Esteemed publications in which I have appeared in recent weeks include BBC Sport Online (which you can see in the picture), The Sun Online (twice), Daily Express, Daily Star Sunday, The Sunday Times, Racing Post and my personal favourite, the Walthamstow Guardian. Not forgetting those great gallahs on the Australian Greyhound Recorder who are also featuring the original Frankster. I've even been on the telly, with appearances on Channel 425 and BBC London to my name. Check this out - things have even got so mad that I have my own fan-site. I love it - don't know who this guy is, but I am flattered. Go right now and read it yourself at www.iloveflyingfrank.moonfruit.com .

I don't want anyone to forget what this is all about though.

Incase you are new to my site, I have launched my own campaign to save the mecca of greyhound racing, Walthamstow Stadium, from closure. There are some big, nasty men who are itching to get their hardhats out and bulldoze the place. Put a stop to this madness by signing the petition at www.savethestow.com

On the downside, while I have been hitting the headlines everyone has come out of the woodwork and wants a little bit of The Flyer - the telebone has not stopped ringing. I've had offers of endorsement deals (a carpenter wanted to launch a new product called The Flying Plank) and TV shows ( I was asked to go on "Stars in their eyes" as Lassie) but I just want to keep focused on what is important. I'm still me after all - a bit rrrrruff around the edges maybe, but still just a working lad from Ireland making his way over here.

So for now, I only care about four things:

1) Winning races (next race rumoured to be either Thursday or Saturday - you will be the first to know)

2) Saving The Stow

3) Rachel Stevens (mmmm....Rachel Stevens)

4) Continuing to collate my celebrity messages

On the last one, please feel free to get involved yourself. I have gathered around 25 myself, but I need as many agents in the field as possible who can collect these for me. We already have a couple (Agent Leigh, you are da man!), but I want the big one - my namesake, Flying Frank Lampard. My army of Triple F's - go get him!

That's all for now, speak soon and welcome to my new readers - drop me a line if you like at woof@flyingfrank.com

Peace. Love. Woof.

Flying Frank

Kells Bells

Hello everyone,

After my victorious win at the end of last week, I decided to take a few days off, as well as keep in touch with a few of my celebrity friends (one of whom you can see in the picture, but more about her later). I wanted to have a change of scenery for a few days, so I decided to take off to Manchester, where some of my old friends were in town.

I have some long-time buddies who originally come from a place in North Manchester called Bury (something us dogs enjoy doing). A few years back they moved across the Pennines to Leads (something us dogs definitely don't enjoy) before settling in Puppy New Guinea. They were back in town for a few days so we decided to head down to Belle Vue greyhound stadium where a few of my mates - and lady friends - hang out. Added to that, England were playing at Old Trafford, where my namesake 'Flying' Frank Lampard came to the rescue and shot England to the world cup (come on the Re-pup-lic of Ireland tonight!).

Incidentally, Lamps is someone I would really like to add to my gallery of stars - anyone who can get him would net themselves Platinum membership of the Triple F club (which stands for Friends of Flying Frank). I am sure my owners would throw in a Scampi and chips at The Stow as well.

Talking of celebrities, you will see that another close pal of mine has left an encouraging message for me. It is none other than the queen of morning telly, Lorraine Kelly, or Special LK as I call her. She is a true gem and even though she wakes up at the crack of dawn every morning....ahem, ask me no questions and you will get no lies.....she is a truly bonny lass. I watch her every day on GMTV (Greyhound Morning Television) and it really sets me up for the day. She is fully behind the Save the Stow campaign (go to www.savethestow.com now to sign up) and for many years has been a Lorraine of sunshine in my life. Infact, I have been thinking about naming my first daughter after her. I was going to give her two first names, hers and that of my first girlfriend, Keisha. Somehow though, Keisha-Lorraine doesn't sound right - it just makes me hungry.

Got to go now I'm afraid, but a bit of general housekeeping first:

- The date of my next race has not been set. I am going to move up a distance to 640 metres and we could be looking at next Tuesday.

- The Rachel Stevens competition is still running, so get your answers into woof@flyingfrank.com

- www.savethestow.com continues to gather signatures from across the globe. Big shout going out to the Office of the Australian Prime Minister!

Speak soon doggie-lovers.

Peace. Love. Woof.


Flying Frank