Wednesday, August 31, 2005

Me & Mr Jones

Being on the 'rest list' has meant that I've been watching plenty of TV lately. I've invested in a home cinema for my kennel, complete (of course) with sub-woofer and like most of the pupulation, I've been gripped by the Ashes.

So it was really nice for my pal and England's best bowler Simon Jones - Jonesy to the Flyer - to send his good wishes. A couple of people have said to me "isn't it brilliant that he can swing it both ways?" Not sure about that one. I always thought Jonesy could easily bowl a maiden over. Terrific guy as well - he has no airs or WG Graces about him and he's a wicket bloke.

Like myself, Simon is laid up with an injury at the moment. In order to get fit for the final test against the Aussies, he's having stints in an oxygen chamber to cure his ankle injury. I asked Jono if I could have the same sort of treatment so I can get back on the track as soon as possible. He said that nearest I'd get to any 02 would be if he let me borrow his phone.

When the cricket hasn't been on I've been a bit stumped on what to do with myself. Luckily, it's my second birthday tomorrow so get your messages in to asap!

Peace. Love. Woof.


Friday, August 26, 2005

Thursday and still injured...

I’m feeling a bit easier and little less sore, but I’m still on the “rest list.”

In addition to the anti-inflammatories and Neurofen, I’ve been having massages every other day with the intention of getting rid of some of the stiffness. I guess Jono doesn’t realise that these massages are having quite the opposite effect. Woof woof!

Anyhow, Jono’s away on holiday at the moment so Dave, aka ‘Dave the Handler’, is running things. He’s a lovely fella and tried to cheer me up today with his favourite greyhound joke…

A Greyhound, a Doberman and a Bulldog are in a bar having a drink when a good-looking female Collie comes up to them and says: "Whoever can say liver and cheese in the same sentence can have me."

So the Doberman says, "I love liver and cheese." The Collie says, "That's not good enough."
The Bulldog says, "I hate liver and cheese." She says, "That's not creative."
Finally the Greyhound says, "Liver alone....cheese mine."

That Dave, he’s a funny man.

Oh yeah, almost forgot, it’s my birthday next week. On September 1st I’ll be two. Send your love and adulation to

I’ll publish the best of your best wishes.

Peace. Love. Woof.

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

Bark & Ryde

Well it hasn't been a very easy time for me lately. Although I am remaining positive, the situation I find myself in is annoying. When you are a top class professional athlete, it really hurts when you can't do what you do best. OK - what I do second best (we all know what I do best, don't we chicas?).

Luckily though, a good buddy of mine has been in touch and it has really helped lift me while I am on the 'rest list'. Above, you can see my good friend, TV's Anna Ryder Richardson, who has taken time out of her Changing Rooms schedule to drop me a line. As well as being an interior decorator, The Ryde-ster is like a lifestyle guru to me - she doesn't allow me to gloss over any situation (she prefers a matt finish) and although she is as daft as a brush, she has a real energetic (white) spirit about her. Full of integrity as well - I know she would never take a backhander or any sort of bung (alow). We have only once had a falling out - and that was all my asphalt.

Anyway, although her wishes are nice to hear, my next race is still a while off. Jono has suggested I relax for a few days. I am chasing my tail round here, so I might head down to my favourite watering hole, the Walk-about in Hyde Bark, for a pint of Volvic (since my two wins, I don't do tap water no more). I will update you on my activities in my next posting.

One last thing - you may be interested to know that I was on the racecard at the Stow on Saturday night, despite everyone knowing that I was out of action (they announced I had 'withdrawn' minutes before the race). hmmmm....wonder why they kept the news from my adoring public? In future, make sure you log on here for all the news, straight from the horses mouth (well not horse, dog you understand, but....oh, you get it.)

OK, I'm outee - don't forget to go to the Sun webchat!

Peace. Love. Woof.


P.S - shout out to my good pal FB - enjoy catching those rays on the bitch!

Friday, August 19, 2005

Battered and bruised

Before I came into the world of professional sport, I'd always heard athletes say that the worst part of their job is being injured.

Well guess what? Here I am laid up in my kennel....injured.

You can see from my last posting at whose paws the blame lies, but I'm not one to bear grudges. 'Let sleeping dogs lie' is my motto.

After getting home the other night from my race I felt OK. I watched the football. England were rubbish, but the Denmark players were useful, great Danes you could say.

But I woke up feeling very very different. I wiped the sleep from my eyes and took my usual stroll to my favourite tree to do what boy dogs do to start the day. I could hardly walk. I was in absolute bloody agony. I limped back to the yard, hobbled towards my kennel and then Jono appeared, he could see something was badly wrong.

The vet came round asap and gave me a full once over. As usual I couldn't stop myself giggling when he asked me to cough. He took Jono to one side and they chatted in the corner out of ear shot. I feared that Jono and the vet would come back over and say the words that strike fear into the heart of every greyhound - "I think it would be best if we helped you have a little sleep now...." It would be fair to say I was Shih Tzu'ing myself.

They didn't (hence this blog still has a dog). It turns out I'm sore, bruised, have muscle damage and perhaps a tear.

Jono has put me on what's known in the greyhound racing business as 'the rest list.' Basically that means no training (or racing) and lots of massages for the next couple of weeks.

I'm going to be dead bored so any messages of support would be greatly appreciated. I will also be very busy answering all your questions in my webchat with The Sun Online, so please click onto the link here:,,3-2005370601,00.html

Don't worry fans, I see this injury as only a blip in my racing career, a minor spaniel in the works as they say. I'll be back.

Peace. Love. Woof.


(PS. I've asked Jono if I can have my massages at the same place Wayne Rooney has his.)

(PPS. I've been asked to say allegedly about the above PS.)

Wednesday, August 17, 2005

The Sun - I love it

In the greatest partnership since Mr Golden got together with Mrs Retriever (you know what I'm sayin'), I have linked up with the Sun Online. It is already my favourite news-puper and since my good buddies over there at the online section asked me in for a webchat we have got very close. They even made up their very own, limited edition, front page (above - pretty nifty, huh?).

This also means that I am welcoming a whole new band of visitors to the site. A big shout out to all my new Triple F's (Friends of Flying Frank), especially to the chaps at who visited me at 4.55pm this afternoon - ahoy there, I bet you are a bunch of Legal Beagles!

To read all about me, and to submit your favourite question, click onto:,,3-2005370601,00.html

You can also enter an exclusive competition to win a trip down to the stow, to see me run, with my owners (apparently they are quite slow over 640 metres and prefer trap 2), so what are you waiting for?!

As far as last night goes, I would prefer not to talk about it. For the last 24 hours, it has been going around and a-hound in my head, replaying itself over and Rover again.

I had a massive crowd from Frank PR ( ) down there to see me run - nearly 20 infact - and I was feeling quite confident. One thing was getting at me though - before the race, I saw Woodlands Vieri and and Show the light having a little bitch about me, saying that my blog was rubbish and that my owners smelt bad, that kind of thing. So I came out of the traps and, lo and behold, Dogs 1 and 5 (and guess who they were!), both went across me, thumped me, whacked me up in the air and put me out of the race. I limped home last, several lengths adrift.

I don't think I have any lasting injuries (I used to suffer from Collar-flour ears) so hopefully all will be OK. To cheer myself up, I went down to my local barkade to play on the machines. All I can tell you is, these boys are no longer chums of mine and they had better watch out. Yeah, that's some fighting talk for you from the Flyer!

OK, so that's it for now people. And don't forget to send your questions into The Sun Online - I can't wait to see them, so get cracking!

Speak soon.

Peace. Love. Woof.


Friday, August 12, 2005

Well, the details for my next race are in and my good friend Teddy Sheringham - or Shezza as I know him - came round the other day to wish me luck. Throughout his career, the Spurs & Man Utd legend has never been too busy to show his devotion to dogs, as you can see from his message here.

There should be a big turnout on Tuesday and because Jono has rested me for the week - he said he didn't want me to get dogged down with the never ending cycle of training and running - I feel as fit as a fiddle. What you need to know is:

Tuesday night, 16th August at The stow

Race 13 (unlucky for some)

22.20 (I'm only a puppy, its a bit late!)

The Give A Stow Dog A Home Stakes (catchy I know)

640 metres

Trap 1 (mmmm....trap 1)

£160 to the winner (blow it all at Charlie Chan's after) + Trophy (now you're talking).

I know my owners are going - if you are popping down let me know! Also, don't forget to send your pics and emails to

Peace. Love. Woof.

Tuesday, August 09, 2005

The Triple F challenge

Hey People,

Well, the entries are in, counted and verified by our judges and the results are posted below. You will remember last week I challenged you all to send in your questions to me, the dog with a blog. I had a huge response from all the members of the Triple F club and the winner good friend Tatum! Your email really touched my heart and you win a special prize - I will email you soon with the details.

For the rest of you, you can take up the next Flying Frank challenge. The cute picture above was sent to me via my good friend Goldie the Dog, which gave me the inspiration for the next task. I want your photo messages! please send your visual memorandum of goodwill to me at and I will print the best one!

In the meantime, enjoy this week's challenge results below...

Peace. Love. Woof.


-----Original Message-----
From: Pipa Unsworth
To: Flying Frank
Subject: Ask Frank

Dear FF,
Is Frank short for anything…Francis? Francesco? Or is it just Frank?


Pipa (short for Philippa)

FF Says: You may have seen my posting last week Pipa, in which case it will come as no surprise to you that Frank is short for Francophile, as in 'an admirer of France and everything French'. I love everything about the country. I did witness an accident once though - when I was there a man jumped into the river. He was later declared in Seine.

-----Original Message-----
From: Charlotte Hickson
To: Flying Frank

Frank - do you have a good hangover cure? Maybe you'll suggest "hare of the
dog" but it just doesn't seem to work for me. Had a fairly heavy weekend
and still struggling today. Any help very happily accepted.
Charl x

FF Says: Chas, Many thanks for nicking my gag there - do it again and I will ban you from the site. Only kidding! Kind of.

Seriously, I would simply recommend taking a headache tablet. Don't try and buy it near the Zoo though - the parrots-eat-'em-all.

-----Original Message-----
From: Jon Tuchband
To: Flying Frank
Subject: A Question for the dog

Dear Frank...

I often like to psyche myself up before competing in various strong man events by listening to some tunes . I was wondering, what sort of tunes gets you going...?
Would it be something like...
'Ain't nothing but hounddog'? Something by 'Snoop'...or maybe even the prodigy in 'Smack by B*tch up'??


Loyal fan

FF Says: Jon - I have wide musical tastes from Grrrrrrr een Day to Doggie Williams to Yazz and the plastic Pupulation. I also enjoy chilling out to a little Bark once in a while and I enjoy the theatre - my favourite musical is Hare. My favourite musician of all time is the Red hot Chilli Peppers guitarist, Flea, and obviously my number one track is Walthamstow.

-----Original Message-----
From: marc@loftfashion []
To: Flying Frank
Subject: question

What is the secret to your success???
Marc, in South Africa

FF Says: thanks for the question Marc.

The Secret of my Success is, of course. a 1987 film starring Michael J Fox as Brantley Foster (aka Carlton Whitfield). A young scamp from the country, Brantley comes to the big city looking for a job and ends up coping off with his bosses wife instead! Thought you'd catch me out there did you?!

-----Original Message-----
From: Charlie Greig
To: Flying Frank
Subject: dear frank,

dear flying frank

i heard about you winning the dog racing cup. well done frank! i hope your great moment of fame was all you hoped it to be. im sure you will win all of the races you are in in the future. i would love to come to see you win the trophy in the next race you are in. you are possibly the best dog that there is. you are so cool.

what is your favourite park?

lots of love tatum

FF Says: Tatum - It's really nice to hear from you. Your words are very kind - and you know what? I think you might be the youngest member so far of the Triple F club (Friends of Flying Frank) - of course this makes you very special and my number one fan!

To answer your question, I always have safety in mind and so in this day and age the place I prefer is a multi storey car bark.

-----Original Message-----
From: Gemma Witcoop
To: Flying Frank
Subject: Hello the flyer

It was lovely to hear about your family life, it really brought a tear to my eye, you are just like your father, and I think that’s wonderful. It’s almost a shame that you couldn’t put some music on your blog during certain parts. I could hear the soft, melodic music in my head when reading about your life!

Anyway, I have a question.

Now that you are a celebrity are you only friends with famous people or are you in touch with your old pals too? Maybe you keep in touch with them on the old dog and bone?

Keep up the good work the flyer

Peace, love, woof

FF Says: Gemma, the same applies to you re: nicking my gags. Don't do it again.

However, you sound a particularly attractive young lady and so I am only too happy to answer. Despite all my celebrity pals, there is absolutely no danger of me displaying any diva like traits - no matter what happens, I will always keep my feet on the hound.

-----Original Message-----
From: Mark Cornell
To: Flying Frank

Flying Frank,

Hello my name is Wolfgang. I'm a German shepherd but now living in Barking. I have just made a TV appearance in France on "Kennel Plus".

I would really love to mate with you.

What do you think? Half man half dog?

Not seen since lynn Faulds Wood stopped presenting Watchdog.
Fancy a rut mutt?
Wolfie x

FF Says: Good to hear from you. I remember Barking from a while back - good place, but I prefer my pad down on the Isle of dogs now. Seems like you enjoy a bit of TV too...I mainly prefer the big screen myself. K:9 with Kevin Spacey was my favourite film of recent years. Also a big fan of football - I think Didier Dogba and Jermain Dogfoe will have great seasons this year.

In terms of meeting, you may have misheard - I am a GREY-hound.

-----Original Message-----
Subject: richiesta informazioni.

Dove posso trovare i frigoriferi portatili della Amstrad nella zona di Venezia ?

FF Says: Silvestro, Io posso dare solamente consiglio su correre, non su fridges Lei la ciambella.

Pace. Con amore. Abbai.

Friday, August 05, 2005

Just not my night...

Apologies that this update is on so late - I have only just got my yaptop back from the repairers, and I know you are all desperate to hare what happened last night...

Well I won't lie to you - I had a minor setback and ended up coming in second last, or fourth first as I prefer to call it (trap three was vacant). From the moment I came out of the traps, I never really got going. I was behind at the first bend and was chasing from there on.

Am pretty philosophical about it - I put my non-win down to the new contact lenses I am trying out at the moment. Didn't really like the optician who fitted them the other day. As soon as I walked into his surgery, he started making a spectacle of himself. I mean, I was listening to what he was saying (I always was a good pupil) but I think he had been out on the lashe the night before and so I just plugged in my eye-pod and tried to ignore him. To cut a long story short he started blaming me for not taking care of my vision (I was framed) and he was frankly a pain in the glass.

I walked out eventually and I need to go to someone who understand my needs. Vision is very important to a Greyhound and I don't like the relationship I have with this optician - I can't see a future in it.

Will write more after the weekend (including the full list of 'Ask Frank' requests). Jono says he has a treat for me for the weekend so will tell all in a couple of days!

Remember to keep your 'Ask Frank' questions coming to - your very last chance.

Have a good one people and remember, if you see a dog - get her number for me...

Peace. Love. Woof.


Tuesday, August 02, 2005

Race 10 and other stuff

Hello Fans,

I hope you are all doing well after the weekend. As for me, I had a really chilled out couple of days. I took a lady friend to Paris and we had the most magical time. Amongst other things we enjoyed a romantic walk down the Bark De Triomphe, visited the Louvre to look at the Bona Lisa and also spent alot of time on the Chomp Elysees. More than anything, it meant that I could be left alone without the puppyrazzi being on my tail the whole time. All in all, very relaxing.

Anyhow, enough of my weekend antics. Just before I launch into my posting though, a bit of general housekeeping...

1) The details of my next race have been announced. I am (hopefully) flying out of trap 2 in the 8.36 at The Stow, this Thursday 4th August. Come and see me, email me for good luck, have a punt on me or just keep your fingers crossed - it is all appreciated.

2) Regular readers - or Triple F's - will know that the topic this week is 'Ask Frank'. This means you can send me your question on any subject under the sun. I have got some great posers in already and I will be posting them all up later in the week. As usual, get your questions into

Now that that is done, on with today's post, dedicated to two very important people in my life...

Mum and Dad

I'm getting a bit conscious that so far on this blog, you only see the rock 'n roll side of my life and haven't yet got to know me properly. What with one race after the other, the celeb bashes, dates with wannabe models and the like, life goes on at such a pace that I sometimes don't have time to let you in on the stuff that really matters to me. So I'll start with those that brought me up by hand, Mum and Dad, or as we say in Ireland, Mum and Dad (Picture of Daddy is above).

In case you weren't aware, I was born in County Clare, Ireland, on September 1st 2003 to my parents who were paw, but happy. My Mum's name is Ard Flash and my Dad is called Bypass Byway. He's where I got my racing genes from and I look up to him. He's retired now, but the pinnacle of his career came when he won the Greyhound Derby in 2002, setting the course record in the process. He often tells me about that night, the crowd, the buzz, the post-race celebrations. Oh yes, and the not so small matter of the 150,000 Euros prize money that set him up for life. Believe me he was larging it after that win - it was Evian in his bowl all the way.

Sadly, that was his last race. He doesn't like to talk about what happened next, but I think that all the fame and the glory just caught up with him. He was never really a dog that liked being in the public spotlight and there he was, cameras flashing everywhere he went, reporters doorstepping him, investigative journalists probing into his past trying to dish the dirt. It got to the stage that he even found a secret camera hidden in his water bowl. As you know by now, this kind of thing is an occupational hazard that his son takes in his stride - sadly though, It all got too much for Dad and he called it a day.

Mum on the other hand was never really the racing sort. She ran a few races in Cork, but found the female dog circuit, as she always puts it, as "a little too bitchy" for her liking. I guess its a bit like women's professional tennis in that respect. She also mentioned that she was often pestered by some of the butch-er girl dogs, or "gayhounds" as she still refers to them.

I phone home every week or so to speak to Mum and Dad. Jono is a bit tight about letting me use his landline so I've got myself a tariff with Vodabone that's not bad value.

So there you have it...I hope you've got to know me a bit better now - I didn't want to give you the impression that I'm a bit shallow and just over here for the champagne lifestyle. London is a daunting place for a puppy and E17 teaches you a fair bit about life. I'm learning the whole time, I'm sure I'll make mistakes, but with your support I'll get through.

More about family life later and my brothers and sisters. All 541 of them (well they say the apple doesn't fall far from the tree, eh ladies?).

Love. Peace. Woof.